I had such a blast last night! My bff's got a kick out of April bringing her chicken/celery. What we dieters do when trying to lose weight! LOL! I really enjoyed the show and having the chance to hangout with all my bff's!





my bff's chance, holls, rach, christina, and myself
at the male show




antionne and i






antionne.... (speechless)









swimwear......







the last 3 food fighters!







monika w/ a "K", poohbear stacey, antionne,


crakin april, and myself GO FOOD FIGHTERS!








more swimwear!




antionne doing his thang








on the way to the show!!!!


"IT'S SHOWTIME! LADIES,
GET UR CAMERAS OUT!"

hanging round the house til its time to get ready for our foodfighters girls night out.

Very good sweaty workout this afternoon. rainy day. went to blockbuster got some movies so that I can go home, crawl in the bed with my hubby, and watch movies the rest of this yuckie day! We have a foodfighter girls night out tomorrow night. I am excited cuz I got a cute "little" dress to wear and I can't wait to see everyone!

Mood: Visited

So I got like 10 hours of much needed sleep. I feel rested but I am still in this blah mood. Aunt Flow has come to visit again. That makes this the 3rd time since we started this competition. 3 TIMES IN 5 WEEKS? What in the world is going on? Hemi and rod finally leave and now Aunt Flow comes back? Can someone please explain this to me?




I really hope that all the people who are supporting me know how much I appreciate each and everyone of them! Thank you guys for helping me back up.

Mood: Depressed

Ok so there is a lot of things going on with this competition and for once I will keep my mouth shut and not gripe about them. I cannot say enough how proud I am of EVERY person in this competition, the ones still here as well as the ones who are gone. When you sit and watch reality tv you never know what it is exactly that they are going through. I love to watch Big Brother and you never know what is going on with these people mentally. You never even think about it. To be locked in a house for 3 months with no connection to the outside world. WOW! I can't imagine it because I have never been in that situation. In this competition we wake up at the gym and go to bed at the gym. We go through so much that I will not go into details because the outside world thinks it "bitching and whining". We all know what we go through and I would NEVER expect anyone on the outside to understand. This week has been the hardest week for me mentally, physically, and emotionally. I consider myself to be a very strong person in more ways than I ever knew. I have found myself and I have lost myself. I have had my share of battles as well as struggles in life just as the next person. But this week I just broke! My spirit is still here but I am mentally, physically, and emotionally broke. I still have enough fight in me to finish this competition because I will never quit. But I have had enough. I, just as everyone in this, has given more than we ever thought possible. I have done things that I never thought I would or could ever do. I have been pushed to limits beyond anything I have ever seen or heard. I have never once said no, I can't, I won't. I have always tried and I have always given it my all. But I am now to the point where I feel my all is not enough. I feel that nothing I do is enough. Yet I will keep pushing myself to do more. I am sorry if I have in anyway hurt anyones feelings. I am not crying or whining or bitching, so please don't kick me while I am down by posting any crap about me being a crybaby. I am just blogging to let all my friends know how I feel and I am here for them because I know right now some are in the same boat as I. I will keep paddling the boat for us no matter how rough this storm may get! DONT GIVE UP!

Words of encouragement

Anonymous said...
Niki. You don't know me, but, I know of you through mutual acquaintances. We are alot alike you and I. You are a very strong person and very opinionated and not afraid to say what you feel. I just wanted to let you know that I admire what a fantastic job you are doing and I know in my heart that you are going to win this thing. Congratulations on the abundant weight loss. Keep it up girl and I will continue to pray for you. Just SHAKE tha HATERS off and hope you feel better


THANK YOU "ANONYMOUS" FOR THOSE WORDS OF ENCOURAGEMENT!

Wednesday 3/26

Was that mean what I said yesterday? I am not gonna get on here and lie by telling you all that everyday is an awesome ride on the merry-go-round! I have been on this for so long now that I am becoming dizzy of going round and round. I am sick of it. I am not saying that I am sick of becoming healthy, or eating healthy. I am sick of all the drama associated with this. You can say what you want about me, that is your right. No ones words can hurt me. I am the only one with the power to allow you to bother me and trust me, no one can bother me. You say that I am overweight because I am full of hate? LMAO!! So only fat people are full of hate? What an idiot. I needed a good laugh today and that cheered me up! The only person I have to prove myself to is myself and I have proved that I have busted my as$ to lose 33lbs. in a month! WHAT? Did you hear that? 33lbs. I have lost more than anyone in this competition, weight and percentage. Not that I am getting the bighead but damn how much more should I have to prove? I do have horrible days just like the next person and when those days arrive I let people know. Let me say it again, I will not get on here and make people believe that this is an easy thing to do and everyday is great. We have cried, laughed, pushed, and each one of us deserve a little more respect than the peps who get on here being smartasses are giving. But then again I am not here for those people so it doesnt really matter! I am very proud of what I have accomplished thus far! I never thought it would or could be possible. Thanks to my trainers and my team, april and stacey! WE DID IT!!! LOOK HOW FAR WE HAVE COME!!! 2 WEEKS LEFT! DID YOU EVER THINK WE WOULD SAY ONLY 2 WEEKS LEFT? AWESOME!!!

Tuesday 3/25

POSITIVE. POSITIVE. POSITIVE. PEOPLE WANT TO HEAR POSITIVE THINGS. NO WHINING. NO COMPLAINING. POSITIVE. POSITIVE. POSITIVE.

WELL UP YOURS! TAKE YOUR POSITIVE , HAPPY THOUGHTS AND SHOVE THEM UP YOUR YOU KNOW WHAT! I AM TIRED, SORE, HUNGRY FOR REAL HEALTHY FOOD, NOT THIS EGG WHITE, FISH, AND BROCCOLI DIET! I AM SICK OF THESE PEOPLE I HAVE TO DEAL WITH IN THIS COMPETITION! GOSSIP. GOSSIP. GOSSIP. SHUT THE FRICK UP!

THATS HOW I FEEL TODAY! IF YOU DONT LIKE IT THEN GET OFF MY PAGE!!!

Monday 3/24

A child who can’t follow rules is a child who’s always in trouble. This book starts with simple reasons why we have rules: to help us stay safe, learn, be fair, and get along. Then it presents just four basic rules: “Listen,” “Best Work,” “Hands and Body to Myself,” and “Please and Thank You.” The focus throughout is on the positive sense of pride that comes with learning to follow rules. Includes questions and activities adults can use to reinforce the ideas and skills being taught.

It’s never too soon to learn the difference between what’s true and what isn’t. Words and pictures help young children discover that being honest in words and actions builds trust and self-confidence. They also learn that telling the truth sometimes takes courage and tact. Includes discussion questions, skits, scenarios, and games that reinforce the ideas being taught.

YA KNOW AFTER LOSING 26.5 LBS. AND OVER 35 INCHES I FEEL WONDERFUL!!!!

STILL PUSHING MYSELF TO CONTINUE LOSING. ITS EASIER BY THE SECOND! LOVE MY FOOD, LOVE MY WORKOUTS, LOVE LIFE!! WHAT MORE COULD YOU ASK FOR? OK OFF TO THE GYM ON THIS EASTER MORNING!

No respect for those who lie their way thru

You say respect one another. But how can you respect a group of people who lie their way through this? Covering for one another by lieing? Lies and cheats are 2 things I will never respect!


Why people lie — and how to tell if they are
There are liars, and then there are LIARS. Dr. Gail Saltz explains why they do it and how to spot one

By Gail Saltz
Contributor
TODAY

Everybody lies. It may only be “white” lies, but everyone tells lies or “omits the truth” sometimes. We start lying at around age 4 to 5 when children gain an awareness of the use and power of language. This first lying is not malicious, but rather to find out, or test, what can manipulated in a child’s environment. Eventually children begin to use lying to get out of trouble or get something they want. White lies, those concocted to protect someone’s feelings, are not a big deal at all. The person, however, who seems to feel compelled to lie about both the small and large stuff has a problem. We often call these folks pathological liars (which is a description, not a diagnosis). They lie to protect themselves, look good, gain financially or socially and avoid punishment. Quite often the person who has been deceived knows that this type of liar has to a certain extent deluded him or herself and is therefore to be somewhat pitied.A much more troubling group is those who lie a lot — and knowingly — for personal gain. These people may have a diagnosis called antisocial personality disorder, also known as being a sociopath, and often get into scrapes with the law. Lying often gets worse with the passage of time. When you get away with a lie it often impels you to continue your deceptions. Also, liars often find themselves perpetrating more untruths to cover themselves. We hold different people to different standards when it comes to telling the truth. We expect, for example, less honesty from politicians than from scientists. We have a vision of purity about those who are doing research, while we imagine that politicians will at least shade the truth about themselves in order to get elected. Why do we dislike liars, especially sociopaths, so much? It’s a matter of trust. When a person lies, they have broken a bond – an unspoken agreement to treat others as we would like to be treated. Serious deception often makes it impossible for us to trust another person again. Because the issue of trust is on the line, coming clean about the lie as soon as possible is the best way to mend fences. If the truth only comes out once it is forced, repair of trust is far less likely. As a parent, the most important message you can send your children about lying is that you always — always — want them to come clean with you. No matter how big a whopper they have told, remind them that you would always rather hear the truth, no matter how bad it is, than be deceived. Tell them there is really nothing more sacred in your relationship than your trust of each other. Of course, all this presupposes that we have discovered an untruth — some people are so expert at deception that it often takes a long time to find out that we have been lied to.How, then, can we best detect whether we are being misled? There is no foolproof way, but there are often clues you can see in behavior that should make you suspicious:Avoidance of eye contact: Usually someone makes eye contact at least half the time they are talking to you. If you notice them avoiding eye contact or looking down during a specific part of a conversation, they may well be lying.Change of voice: A variation in pitch of voice or rate of speech can be a sign of lying. So can lots of umms and ahhs.Body language. Turning your body away, covering your face or mouth, a lot of fidgeting of hands or legs can indicate deception.Contradicting yourself:. Making statements that just don’t hold together should make you suspicious. If you lie all the time, even about unimportant things, you are likely to have a problem that will eventually -- if it hasn’t already -- cause you real relationship, financial or legal troubles. Figuring out what is driving you to lie in the first place will help heal this self-destructive behavior. This may mean going into treatment with a therapist to discover why you feel the need to deceive.Dr. Gail Saltz is a psychiatrist with New York Presbyterian Hospital and a regular contributor to “Today.”

oh the weather outside is....

SO BEAUTIFUL!!!

It is such a pretty Spring day and all my flowers are in bloom. I am heading to the gym here shortly. I am so glad I am off work for the next three days! LOTS AND LOTS OF REST! Thats all I am going to say about that.

How did Keith Sweat say it "TWISTED"

You can twist, turn, or add words to what I said. You can even make me the jack in all this. I don't care what you guys say or do.

I am so proud of myself for producing the morning show! And the pay was great! Thankx Q.

Thursday 3/20 First Day of Spring!!!

I woke up late this morning but I was able to make it to the gym 10 mins. early! Antionne pushed us as if it were our first day all over again. I threw my cig's away as soon as I left the gym. I have a lot of work to do. Our "team" is so small right now. Just 4 of us. I can honestly say that this week will be my hardest. I will push myself everyday all day to burn as much as I can. Well I gotta get some work done.


I still wanna say that this entire contest is bogus! It sux when certain people do not follow the rules and yet they are still here! What happened to ,"Competitors must attend all training sessions and weigh-in sessions. If a competitor cannot attend training sessions or weigh-ins they will no longer be deemed a competitor." Was there an exception added somewhere that I may have missed?
As for all the ones who have been at EVERY training session, wrote EVERY blog, and have NEVER been late, YOU ROCK!

WEDNESDAY 3/19

I LOST 9.50 LBS. THIS WEEK!!!!! THAT MAKES IT A TOTAL OF 26.50 LBS. !!!
So I am excited but it sucked to have to vote today. Ashley is a GREAT person and I will miss her so much! I HATE THIS CRAP!

Well it's a fresh new week and that just means I have to work harder this week. It stinks that we are down to 4 people. 50% chance to be in the bottom, 25% chance to go home. I wonder how this is gonna play out with the other team having 6. I wish we would combine and have it everyone for themselves, which it is like that now but I would have better chances if we combined. Down to the bottom 4 and then what? Once someone beats out our team then they will have to continue to beat out the other team? Ok I guess thats where they will bring someone back. Maybe to try and even teams? I dont know and I guess it doesn't matter. I will just try my hardest not to get in the bottom two!


GOOD LUCK TO EVERYONE THIS WEEK!

THE CALM B4 THE STORM

I AM SO DREADING TOMORROW! WEDNESDAYS SUCK!

So today is Tuesday and I am still hurt from Hemmi and Roid. They have really upset me. They don't want to go away and leave me alone. They want to hang around in anger while I try to workout. This morning was really hard. They wouldn't let me run on the treadmill. I don't like them and I wish they didn't like me so much. So anyway I have tried everything to calm them down but nothing works. I will just have to deal with them for now.

Hey since there will be three in one tomorrow at weigh in, Hemmi, Roid, and myself can I get a deduction from my weight?

HEM WHAT?

OK SO I KNOW I WAS COMPLAINING ABOUT NOT BEING ABLE TO GO POOPOO. WELL I HAVE GONE AND NOW I HAVE A MUCH LARGER PROBLEM.... MY BOTTOM IS HURTING SO BAD THAT I CANT SIT, WALK, STAND, OR LAY DOWN. THIS IS WORSE THAN BEING BACKED-UP.


PLEASE LORD DON'T LET MATT OR ANTIONNE MAKE ME BOUNCE ON MY BOTTOM OR RIDE ON THE BIKE OR DO ANY CRAZY EXERCISE THAT WILL HURT MY BOTTOM.......

no lunch workout

well i was gonna go workout at lunch but someone on my team took my workout clothes from the gym. i understand they thought i left them there on accident and they didnt want anything to happen to them but i did that for a reason. hmmmm. so that blows... guess ill go do something else.

Monday 3/17

So workout was good this morning. I enjoyed my chat with KMAK. SHE IS THE STRONGEST, MOST KICK AS$ PERSON IN THIS COMPETITION! AWESOME LADY! So I am at work and I talked to KKL about the whole blogging issue. I think it would only be fair to have some sort of punishment for those who do not blog. We will see..... So I seen certain people trying to get in more wrokout time! So I guess we are stepping up the competition. I guess I am gonna get my tail in there at lunch time to get an extra hour or so in. Let the games begin!!!!

SUNDAY 3/16

WOOHOO! I GOT 2 HRS IN AT THE GYM! I love our new diet. TUNA is sooooo good! I was able to get some rest in today. I also got caught up on some episodes of Big Brother and Biggest Loser. I love the weekend, just wish it was a little longer!

BACK 2 U KMAK

Dedicated back to KMAK!! And all the ladies who are still here busting their as$es to stay in this competition! All the sweat and tears will be worth it in the end! STAY STRONG!!!!

SATURDAY 3/15

YES! THANK GOD I FINALLY WENT!!!
Everyone better watch out I think I lost ten pounds last night! I feel so much better. OK. Enough with the shit talk. I went to the gym and worked out for 2 hours today. Now I am eating my tuna salad. Tonight we are taking the kids to the movies. Mmmmmm... popcorn....coke......candy.......not me. I'll be having water and celery! Well I hope everyone has a nice weekend!

Funny Videos

Am I the only one who is not able to go to poopoo? LOL! I am miserable cuz I gotta go so bad and I can't! I NEED FIBER! Antionne told me to drink some prune juice! YUCK! But I need to go BAD!!

Is it Friday yet?

Hell no it's only Thursday! I had a huge test this morning and I didn't do as well as I would have liked but I passed. I am sleepy today! I guess I stayed up too late doing 30 pages of homework and studying. I am so ready to hit the gym tonight! Matt-sgt. slaughter-mr.brokea$$ stopwatch tried to kill us last night and I believe he his going to finish the job tonight. But I am ready for him. I am getting ready to leave work and go see my husband for a few moments before I head to the gym. Have a nice evening everyone!

AND AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO IS GONNA GRIPE ABOUT ALL THE GAS WE ARE USING? DONT YOU GUYS THINK THEY SHOULD GET SOME MAPCO'S AND BP'S TO PITCH IN SOME GAS CARDS? I KNOW I GOT $40 ON TUESDAY AND I AM ON EMPTY AGAIN. AND YES MAYBE IT BECAUSE I LIVE SO FAR AWAY BUT MAN CANT WE GET SOME HELP!

WHAT DAY IS IT?

I swear I can't remember what day it is. The weeks are dragging by so slowly. It feels though it should be Friday already. I am with Michella on the "Aunt Flow" came to town. I hate this. Do you think we can get a 2 lb. pass when this happens? LMAO..Just kidding KMAK dont go off on me by saying that I am complaining about "Aunt Flow". HEEHEEHEE! It just sucks!!
So Sgt. Slaughter killed me tonight. What is his deal? He has no pitty for fat people. OK I am cutting it short cuz its 10pm and I gotta be up in 4 1/2 hours.
Have a great day to everyone tomorrow!!

SUCK IT UP

"This is a freakin competition.
We all signed up for it.
I am sorry the Food Fighters had 2 people to quit on them, but rules state someone will be voted off every week.
GET IT GOT IT GOOD!
It is sad for both teams to have to vote off a friend, but we have to. Get use to it.
Look on the bright side.....it makes you that much closer to $5000.00 and a trip. Even though this may not be motivating you right now it will be soon. Suck it up....You signed up for it !!!!"

I read this very clearly. And to tell you the truth I see what your saying but even if there were people complaining about voting off even though we had people quit you still said, "It is sad for both teams to have to vote off a friend, but we have to. Get use to it. Suck it up...You signed up for it"

I am just saying that we all have made special bonds with our team members and for you to say "Suck it up" was hurtful whether or not it was directed to bitchy people who didn't want to vote off or not. Eviction is eviction, we all hate it but your right that is the name of the game. I just think it could have been said differently and not so much in a way that was cruel. But then again you were very blunt about it and I too find myself to be just the same.

"Suck it up!...Thats what you signed up for!!!"

LAST WEEEK ON THE FORUM:

"I am tired of keeping my mouth shut so here it goes!!!! This is a freakin competition. We all signed up for it. I am sorry the Food Fighters had 2 people to quit on them, but rules state someone will be voted off every week. GET IT GOT IT GOOD! It is sad for both teams to have to vote off a friend, but we have to. Get use to it.

Look on the bright side.....it makes you that much closer to $5000.00 and a trip. Even though this may not be motivating you right now it will be soon. Suck it up....You signed up for it !!!!"


CAN SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME HOW CAN ONE PERSON BE SO INSENSITIVE TO US LAST WEEK BY TELLING US TO "SUCK IT UP...YOU SIGNED UP FOR IT!!!!" AND YET THIS MORNING THEY ARE CRYING LIKE A FREAKIN BABY ON THE RADIO? WTF?
IT DIDN'T FEEL GOOD WITH THE SHOE ON THE OTHER FOOT DID IT? MAYBE PEOPLE SHOULD THINK BEFORE THEY GET ON HERE AND MAKE COMPLETE ASES OUT OF THEMSELVES! WE ARE ALL HUMANS WITH FEELINGS AND MOST OF US ARE GIVING THIS OUR ALL AND MAKING LIFELONG FRIENDS IN THE PROCESS. SO CAN EVERYONE BE A LITTLE MORE THOUGHTFUL WHEN IT COMES TO EVICTIONS AND HARSH WORDS?



AS FAR AS THE WEIGH IN GOES:
GREAT JOB TO EVERYONE! KMAC YOU DID ROCK THE SCALE THIS WEEK! AND ANDY I AM GLAD YOU WEREN'T FED TO THE WOLVES! WE NEED SOME PEOPLE WITH SENSE OF HUMORS IN THIS COMPETITION! LOL! AND FOOD FIGHTERS I LOVE YOU BIOTCHES! NO MATTER WHAT I AM THANKFUL I GOT THE OPPORTUNITY TO MEET EACH ONE OF YOU!

GOOD LUCK TO EVERYONE THIS WEEK!!!

TUESDAY 3/11

DAY BEFORE WEIGH-IN

I dread the mornings that Antionne changes into his workout clothes because I know what’s coming. “Niki, let’s go.” I am the “chosen one” when it comes to working out with Antionne. I hate it but at the same time I really love that I am pushed to do levels I would never do alone. The entire time I am side by side with him I want to stop and take a breather but I can hear him say, “YOU CAN MAKE YOUR BODY DO ANYTHING FOR AN HOUR.” It is so hard but I have the Antionne voice pulling me through.
I made it through this morning’s workout and then headed to Covington to attend class. I really hate going to school with all this training and work going on.
My two sons just started baseball last night and I missed their first practice. But I will try to make it soon.
I am really wondering about tomorrow’s rule 5A. I mean we are down to 6 people and the 6 that are left are the ones who REALLY work their booties off to still be here. I hate to keep seeing people drop out when those of us who are left want it more than anything. How do you go through this for 2 weeks and then just quit? I mean using your kids as an excuse is even worse. YES children get sick but you could call like before and let Antionne and Matt know whats up. They would excuse you but you didn’t call and then when your entire team calls you, you don’t answer the phone. COME ON!! We all (FOOD FIGHTERS) know what really happened the morning before and that was coward of you to just walkout. I am just pissed but at the same time I have to agree with Abizzle about this being a competition and that just gets more people out of the way quicker. But I’m still pissed. I want everyone to do well in this and QUITTING IS NOT AN OPTION!

Ok! Enough ranting and raving. I am excited to see what will go down tomorrow and to see how much weight everyone is still losing! GOOD LUCK TO EVERYONE WHO’S LEFT!

WE ALL NEED A GOOD LAUGH!

1. STRESSED is just DESSERTS spelled backwards.
2.Diets are for people who are THICK and tired of it.
3. People go to Weight Watchers to learn their LESSENS.
4. I DRIVE WAY TOO FAST TO WORRY ABOUT CHOLESTEROL.
5. THE FAST DIET: If you are thin, don't eat fast. If you are fat, don't eat-- FAST!!!
6. The best way to lose weight is by skipping... skip the desserts... skip the snacks... skip the beer... skip the SKIPPY.
7. DIET JOKE: Try my wife's new recipe for diet meatloaf... Don't worry, you won't eat much..
8. GRAVITY BRINGS ME DOWN.
9. ONE SHOULD EAT TO LIVE NOT LIVE TO EAT.
10. THOU SHALT NOT WEIGH MORE THAN THY REFRIGERATOR.
11. GOD MUST LOVE CALORIES BECAUSE HE MADE SO MANY OF THEM!
12. LIFE IS FULL OF UPS AND POUNDS.
13. HAVING A PERFECT BODY ISN'T DIFFICULT... IT'S IMPOSSIBLE.
14. THE HAIGHT DIET: TO LOSE WEIGHT JUST EAT THE STUFF YOU HATE.
15. DIETING IS THE PENALTY FOR EXCEEDING THE FEED LIMIT.

WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME?

My brother made me a cd of old pictures and as I was looking through them I was shocked to see how big I had gotten and nobody had even thought to say anything to me! I mean I have a very open family and we all tell each other pretty much how we feel most of the time. "Get a life Chris" (inside joke to my brother) I mean trust me, my family is not one bit scared to hurt anyones feelings. My brother had skipped 10 years of family reunions because he didn't want to hear our family talk about how much of a fatas he was. And I see these pictures of me and I have to question myself, "WHAT IN THE HELL HAPPENED?" Talk about letting yourself go! I invented that statement! Where was my family during this time, BLIND? This is sad but I am glad I have made a change!!! GOOD LUCK TO ALL OF US!




IS THAT MY AS? HOLY COW!


AND LOOK AT THAT STEAK OF AN ARM!

GOSH I WAS MISERABLE!!! THANK YOU Q1075 FOR GIVING ME THIS OPPORTUNITY!

PEAKED MONDAY 3/10

This hour change has me all messed up! Instead of 3am that I was sorta getting use to, now 3am is really 2am to my body and mind. AH! It was so hard to get outta bed. This mornings workout was intense. Level 14 on the stairmaster with Matt yelling "STAY UP, I'M ADDING ANOTHER MINUTE! GET UP THERE!" was horrible. I do have to say when it was over I had that feeling you have after sex when you kinda can't move and you cry for whatever reason but you have all these emotions and feelings and numbness. Well thats what I felt like when I hit the floor and couldn't move. I am still kinda in shock but it was a good workout I must say!

WEEKENDS

So Saturday I got up early with my kids and we played in the snow! I got the lawn mower out and I hooked a cord to a laundry basket and pulled the kids around! It may sound ridiculous but the kids and I enjoyed it. I met up with my bff's to go to the gym and workout from 12-2pm. That night my husband and I went to Tunica and played some roulette. Got home too late but I had the chance to sleep in. As far as Sunday went, I picked up my girlfriends and we went to lunch and to the Women's Show. I will never go back to another Womens Show while I am on a diet. FOOD! FOOD! FOOD! I am not totally cured yet. I still want good, fat, food! The BBQ nachos from Corkey's really made me sad. Anyways, it was horrible and my girldfriends were mean to me. They ate everything in sight and made fun of me cause I brought my celery and water. The rest of my Sunday I spent at work until 8pm. I HATE WEEKENDS! During the week it is easy because we workout, go to work, workout, go home, go to bed! You don't really realize how much our lives revolve around food until the weekend. Everything you do has food in it. We got out shopping; everyone wants to stop and eat lunch. Go out to the movies; popcorn, cokes, candy. Girls night out; alcohol, dinner. Baseball game; hot dogs, peanuts, crackerjacks! I feel like there has been a part of my life that has been taken away. It really has if you think about it. I know when this is over I will be able to eat when I am out with friends and family but I must make the right choices on what I eat. But for now it is hell on the weekends because I am on this "Gotta eat what I am told" diet. I guess this is the price we gotta pay for getting healthy!

Sat 3/8

Weekends are tough! I am around so many people eating so many things that I cannot have. I have decided to lock myself in on the weekends!
I am so proud of myself! I am hanging in there and doing what I never thought I could do. I am surprised I haven't ran to McD's by now! I would love some fried rice! But I am doing this and I will not stray!!!

IT'S MY BIRTHDAY!

My team got me two cards for my b-day. Not one but two! I must be really special! Thanks guys those were the FUNNIEST cards ever! I have been so down today because I hate having birthdays. My brother came to visit me at work this morning and he got me a “Biggest Loser” tee and he made a cd with a lot of old pics. I was really depressed after that. There are pictures of me from last year that are absolutely disgusting. I left work early cuz of the bad weather that was coming in. It wasn’t bad to me at all. I got home around 3pm and we all cuddled up in the bed and slept until a little after 8pm. I needed this rest! Well I gotta jump off here so I can get some cardio in before Friday is over!

Thursday 3/6

I feel like a new woman today!! I have been taking my meds and apartently they are working! Our workout was good this morning. I like doing the weights in the morn and cardio at night. Just want everyone to know we are all in this together and we should not let the "outside" world bring us negativity. EVERYONE INVOVLED IN THIS COMPETITION HAS SACRIFICED TO BE HERE AND HAS WORKED THEIR TAILS OFF TO STILL BE HERE! GOOD JOB FOOD FIGHTERS AND GUT BUSTERS!

i love you biotches!

Yes we have made bff's here! BEST FOOD FIGHTERS!

Thankx for the great workout tonight! The sunset and view was nice! I really appreciate the amount of support and push that Odessa and Stacey give! You all are the GREATEST!

WEIGH IN DAY

So I lost 5.75lbs. this week which brings my total to 13.75. I have lost 20.75 inches also. IN 10 DAYS PEOPLE!!!!! THATS IS AMAZING!!! My team had to eliminate this week and 4/6 people voted for Monika to go. It was a tough choice but thats the way the cookie crumbles. The radio station is so full of drama it aint funny. We gave them something to laugh about in our confessions though. So I am feeling much better as far as my legs go but I feel like shit cuz my ears, throat, body, and head is killing me. I really cant afford to get sick right now so I think I am going to leave work and go to the doctor. I need to get something to knock this out. COUGH.... AAACHOOO... Bless me.. Ok gotta go sanitize my hands!

TUESDAY 3/4

Playing Superwoman has caught up with me. I have hurt my legs so bad! They don't want to cooperate with me. They just keep giving out! And I think I have come down with something. My ears are really hurting and my throat feels like razors when I swallow. My body has that ache all over feeling. OK OK ENOUGH WITH BEING A CRY BABY! I am very tired and this getting up at 3am and not going to sleep until 10pm is killing me. I need more than 5 hours of sleep. I just cant function. We measured today and I have lost 20.75 inches and 13.75 lbs. in 9 days. I am very proud of myself! When I got home my husband had the house cleaned, laundry done, kids feed, bathed, and in bed. I soaked in the tub for at least an hour then I hit the bed HARD. I got up at 1:05am. Jumped outta bed went into the bathroom and started to get ready. I look at the clock and was like, "Shit! Its only 1am" so I went back to bed and waited until the alarm went off to get back up.

DEAR KARSON AND KENNEDY (not Laddy cuz hes a fence rider)

3 am the alarm sounds. It is telling me to get up! Ok! Ok! I am up! I had my green tea and then I started to get my things together to start a new week; although week 1 and week 2 have just ran into one another since I worked out both days. I got plenty of rest over the weekend so I am ready to go. I arrived at the gym at 4:35am. We had one of the GREATEST workouts. Now I am off to work. OK so my cell rings and it is Karson and Kennedy. (Mistake #1: answering) I was interrogated about this past weekend. Why we did or didn’t workout and if we did or was we suppose to or who didn’t show up and why and QUESTIONS?!!!?! QUESTIONS?!!???!!!!! QUESTIONS?!!!?!!?!!!! I told them that it was OPTIONAL! What else did they want? When OUR TRAINERS GIVE US A DAY OFF OR EVEN TWO IT IS FOR A REASON. OUR TRAINERS ARE THE EXPERTS HERE. THEY KNOW EXACTLY WHAT THEY ARE DOING! IF KARSON, KENNEDY, OR LADDY THINKS THAT OUR TRAINERS ARE WRONG THEN I WOULD LOVE TO SEE THEM VOICE THEIR CONCERNS WITH OUR FOOD FIGHTERS TRAINERS.
I worked out both days and I am doing so awesome and whatever they think will not get me down. I have gone from wearing a size 16/18 in jeans to a 14 in JUST ONE WEEK!! I am so proud that I have lost 8 lbs. in the first 4 days and 12lbs. in 1 week! COME ON KARSON! Our team is strong and we have THE GREATEST TRAINERS. We have 100% confidence in our trainers that they know exactly what they are doing. I am enjoying this and I thank you guys for choosing me but just have some faith!

LOVE YOU GUYS!

My Routine

Me
Wake at 3am, leave house by 3:30am to make it to the gym by 5am. Workout from 5-6am, drive to Covington to attend class at Dyersburg State from 8-9:30am, I then drive back to Memphis to work. At 5pm I then leave work drive to the gym to workout from 6-7pm. I leave the gym and arrive at home around 8:30. From there it is eat, shower, bed by 10pm so that I can at least get 5 hours of sleep.


This is not much compared to my WONDERFUL husband, Dwayne. Without him I would not be able to be apart of this life changing experience.

Dwayne
He wakes at 3am to make sure that I am up and ready to go. He then gets up by 6am so that he can get our kids ready for school. He feeds them, dresses them, and sends them onto school. Off to work he goes! He leaves work by 5pm to go get kids. Gets home and has to make dinner for the kids, takes them to basketball/baseball for the boys and cheerleading for our youngest daughter, does homework, and baths. He then makes my dinner before I get home; which consists of tilapia on the grill and steamed broccoli, every night. He also gets my meds ready for taking,boils my eggs and grills my chicken for the following day. He makes sure my cell phone is charged each night and places all my belongings together such as keys, purse, etc., so that I do not have to spend all morning looking for all my stuff. And last but not least he makes sure that I have lotion on my legs and feet so that they are extra soft!

I am blessed to have such a wonderful husband to help me make it through this and to make it possible for me to be apart of this.

Dwayne you are the greatest thing! I love you more than anything in this world!

Sunday 3/2

Slept in AGAIN!!! I am gonna go hit the gym in just a few. It is such a beautiful weekend!! My husband, Hunter, Hannah, Peyton, and Camron, (and Jewel our black lab) are going to the park today and play some baseball. My boys just ended basketball last weekend and now baseball starts Monday. My 7 yr. old daughter, Hannah, had her cheerleading competition last night and won for "Most In-Step"Today we have a lot planned. Gotta go workout, wanna go to the park, gotta team basketball/cheerleading party from 1-3pm., gotta go get some groceries, need to clean house, wanna catch up on all the Biggest Loser and American Idols I have missed but have recorded, and gotta go to work for a bit. BIG DAY! So I must go get started! Have a wonderful Sunday to all of you!

Saturday 3/1

I feel so good having slept in this morning! Workout went great! Food is still great! Everything is great! Can’t wait until Wednesday!!